Connect ⁂ #hopewriterlife

One of the most basic human needs is that of connection with others. This need is as important as the needs for food, air, water, and shelter. We are hardwired to connect with others to the degree that the the reward center of the brain lights up at the mere presence of another human in the room, at the holding of a hand, at the presence of a cared for other. They don’t have to be anywhere near us because even thinking about the Other creates the same response and becomes addicting.

Our brains, our humanity, seek out connections with others for reasons far beyond procreation.

Our bodies require human touch in order to thrive. We have less disease and greater immunity when we have healthy physical touch and connection. We have better sleep, better mental health, and better physical health when we have physical human connection, and I’m not just talking about intimate connection. Conversely, without physical connection, we have low relationship satisfaction, a propensity to avoid significant relational attachments, anxiety, stress, and depression.

In fact, even in patients who are no longer able to sense physical touch, their insula, a part of the brain that processes emotions, will light up under an MRI when their body is touched and they cannot see it happening.

It is essential for human beings to have meaningful connections with others, both physical and emotional.

If you are missing the kind of meaningful connection in your everyday relationships that leave you feeling something other than the warmth and glow of fulfillment and happiness, if you are lacking that essential physical touch or the emotional affection that lights up your reward center like a Christmas tree, make a change.

You need it. Body, heart, mind, and soul, you need connection.

6 thoughts on “Connect ⁂ #hopewriterlife

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    1. It is true. Those in the spectrum, with sensory processing differences, and other conditions, like fibromyalgia, must be respected in what their body physically needs with touch, and those with PTSD and trauma will have different needs for physical touch as well depending on what is or is not perceived to be safe touch for them. It is true that we are not all the same in what kind of physical connection or touch is best, but we all still need human connection.

      You are always here connecting with me. No physical touch is necessary for me to know you are a friend and that you care.


      1. well son tom punishes me when i speak. he likes to share his right winged antics. just like jack ruby and utah senator mike lee gwen~ arent you glad ur in colorado?


  1. I on the other hand am fully on the other end of the spectrum from utahan15. I touch and hug people. Not just because they are asking for it, but to feed my soul and heart. I try to be aware of those with a space around them. Unfortunately this period of Covid19 has me in great need. I am getting hugs from my kids and that’s what’s keeping me going. I must be extra careful as I go see my mother and I refuse to bring anything near her. She is in her upper 90’s and still healthy as an ox. For her I will stay away from the physical touch and nearness I crave.


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